Random
by Kirzsid
Summary: Alice decides to start a game. Everyone has to tell the family the msot random thing they've ever done that none of them know about.
1. Emmett

**Random**

_Bella POV._

It had been exactly a year since my new life as a vampire. Neisse had grown up a little more by each day but I had no longer had worries of her growing too fast. She is very interested in classic stories like me, you can normally find her in her walk in closet lying in a pile of pillows reading. That's my girl. Edward, Carlisle and Esme were a while away hunting for a few days for some animals that have been causing trouble. I felt really, really bored without him. I sat down by the window remembering my fuzzy, human memories. Me and Edward in science... the car crash...him saving me...the fight after that...our first date.

Alice ran into the room with Jasper walking behind pulling me out of my thoughts.

"BELLA!" she yelled making me jump.

"Alice." I replied boredom jumping out of my words.

"Jasper." She trailed off giving him a look.

"Jasper?" I arched my eyebrow.

Suddenly I felt happy not the extreme type but enough to make me have a little smile. I felt a little bad that my boredom must of been annoying Jasper. Alice suddenly pulled me up and we ran along to the main house then sat me on a couch and went off to her own with Jasper. Rosalie and Emmett were already on a couch across from me.

"Hey guys." I smiled at them.

"Bella" They both replied together which caused me to laugh and of course Emmett joined in because he'll laugh at every chance he can.

After our laughter died down I turned to Alice who was staring at Jasper as he was staring at her.

"Alice, what are we doing here?" I asked as Rosalie and Emmett turned to her waiting for her answer.

_Alice POV._

I already knew Bella would ask so I was prepared to reply.

"We dear sister are playing a sort of...game" I replied wondering if game was the right word, their faces all had the same look of confusion.

Emmett was of course a little ahead of them and started jumped up and down on the couch yelling "Me first, me first!" with his hand raised as high as it could go which was pretty high. All the jumping nearly made Rosalie fall off and she slapped the back of his head then he stopped immediately.

"Emmett," I watched his face light up at the possibility of him being chosen." Truthfully, what's the most random thing you've **ever **done?"

He suddenly looked very in thought and I received a vision about his story. I was so shocked all I could do was open my mouth. I was wondering why he would do that but then I saw the funny side and started to laugh until Emmett opened his mouth to speak.

"About two years ago..."He trailed off.

_Emmett POV._

Most random thing I've ever done. Hmm I got the perfect one this will be good even Eddy doesn't know. They wouldn't be disappointed but Rose would probably be mad.

"About two years ago..."

**-Flashback-**

Bored...Bored...Bored. Everyone's gone hunting leaving poor Lil' Emmy all alone, even my Rose Petal left without anything more than a wave. Maybe I forgot an anniversary or something. What should I do to pass the time? Hmmm...I know! A movie...A vampire movie! Everyone else thought they were a waste of time but I think some of them are awesome.

I starting playing Van Helsing and I was up to the part were there in that hot princess castle when I let my mind wonder. Castles...Weapons...old vampires...Volutri! I have a plan. I would pay the Volutri a little visit they would never forget. I packed up my Hannah Montana wig and scarf and a few other necessities. I made my way to the airport so excited about my plan. I'm sure it'll work out. On my plane I made up a plan on everything I'd do and say. Before I knew it we were ready to land.

**-Half an hour later-**

I'm finally at the castle, not much security. I ran past their human assistant to fast for her to notice me and into the huge hall to see Aro, Marcus and Caius. They all stared at me confused while I stared at me confused while I grinned at them.

"Emmett Cullen?" Aro asked confused.

"Yes, I came to give you a..." I paused for dramtic effect and smiled widely,"SHOW!"

There all stared at me wondering if I was out of my mind, I twirled around so fast changing into my costume. I was wearing a long Hannah Montana wig, purple scarf, Fluoro pink jump suit and Rosalie's bright red leather knee boots. She's going to kill me for putting holes in them to make my toes fit.

"What in the world?" Marcus said quietly, probley shocked about how hot I looked.

Before they could say more I started singing.

"I kissed Aro and I liked it taste of his extra pale lips, I kissed Aro and I liked it...alot," I paused taking in their reactions, they were all shocked but Aro looked a little amused so I continued singing, "I kissed Marcus and I liked it, taste of his fantastic mouth, I kissed Marcus and I liked it, I liked it," Once again I paused watching their expressions all the shock was gone and replaced with amusement and again I continued, " I kissed Caius and I liked it taste of his smexy muscles," I paused winking as he opened his mouth speechless," I kissed Caius and I liked it, I liked it. It felt so right not really wrong, I really truly like it I kissed you all and we liked it, we liked it!" I finished my song with a bow.

"When and why did we kiss him?" Caius asked confused.

"In your dreams... and last new year" I laughed and winked before running off to the airport.

I got home and packed away my costume then I ran to my xbox and set up my favourite game. About an hour later my family returned.

Rose walked up to me "Did you do that all weekend?" She was clearly disappointed in my lack of a life.

"Basically" I replied with a grin thinking of after they left and me playing an action game then me watching Van Helsing.

I smiled and said, "I missed you" then we walked up to our room to spend some time alone.

**-End flashback-**

"And that is the most random thing I've ever done" I said finishing my story.

"My lord!"..."So weird."..."You kissed them?" was a few of the things I heard but then Rosalie slapped me.

"YOU! You took my favourite boots and ruined them!" She stormed off.

"Rosalieeee!" I ran after her at vampire speed "I love you...does that help?"


	2. Jasper Jazzy KaWazzy

_Alice Pov._

I looked into the vast world of the future to see who would go next. It seemed Jasper had a story though I'm not sure anyone's could be better than Emmett's story.

"So who's it gonna be?" Bella urged getting a little bored.

"My love, Jazzy Ka-Wazzy".

"I told you not to say that in front of people." Jasper murmured quietly, embarrassed everyone knew his pet name.

"Oh shush, well your story?"

_Jasper Pov_

I scanned trough my memories trying to find something. I found the right one I hoped they weren't disappointed. It was truly the oddest thing I've ever done.

"Ok, well about three years ago..."

**-Flashback-**

Lovely, beautiful, tropical Alice. We had just come back from our island vacation at Esme's Island. Alice suggested we be like tribal people of course that meant grass skirts and coconut bras, I still wonder why I wore that. I'm so whipped.

Everyone was otherwise occupied and Alice was unpacking our stuff I offered to help but she said "I think I need to colour coordinate your shoes again". Right, then I was watching an awful show called Ugly Betty. She really is **Ugly** Betty.

The life of Vampires ain't what it seems. Thankfully an ad came on. Is was a wonderful building with a yellow 'M' on top and a man holding up a burger.

"This Bigmac is for absolutely everyone with a delicious burger, drink and fries for only $4.95 limited time only."

How ridiculous, who talks like that. Strangely I couldn't get the ad out of my head. I think I want a Bigmac. I called up to Alice telling her I was going to the mall for an anniversary gift. Wrong move, she immediately insisted she come something about, "Gucci sale once in a lifetime". Although I told her I needed to do this on my own and raced out into Alice's Porsche. I used this really good program on my phone called 'GPS' to find the closest McDonalds.

**-Ten minutes later-**

I went through the drive thru and came up to the window.

"Hi, how may I help you? Wow!" Typical, The girl stood there staring at me then at my car, maybe it would've been better if I took Emmett's Jeep.

Great Jasper, way to look gay.

"Hello, Can I have the-" I paused and thought about how to say it, "...Big Mac"

"Oh, Four Ninety-Five". She looked a little disappointed now.

I handed her a five dollar note and drove to the next window. Oh good a man least I'll get my food in less than an hour. He turned around to face me and gasped.

"Wow, you're beautiful" My god, maybe I should reconsider Subway.

"Yes...Is my order ready?"

He handed me a bag and his number I smiled and drove off a little faster.

When I arrived at a quiet street I took out the burger and brought it to my mouth. Quickly I threw it into my mouth and chewed slowly. It was awful...

I jumped out of the car and stood in the middle of the road.

"WHY! WHY DO THEY ADVERTISE THIS?" A little boy came by on his scooter, "BE WARNED MCDONALDS IS AWFUL STAY AWAY FROM THE YELLOW M."

He started yelling and running away. I sat back into my chair i the car after I threw up my burger. I thought why not and started eating the chips and drinking the coke in a rhythm. Chip, Drink, Chip, Drink, Chip, Drink, Chi-...It's gone I finished it and I liked it.

I drove home wondering why I liked that foul human food.

**-Twenty minutes later-**

"Alice, I'm home!"

"Honey" She zoomed down her smile disappearing when she saw me, "I thought you were buying me a present?"

"Well they were all out of the stock I wanted so it's getting shipped from Canada in about a week. I'm sorry honey."

"It's ok, gives me time to get you one darling."

"Oi! Enough with the _Honey_ and _Darling_." Emmett of course ruined the moment.

"What's that smell?"

"Uh, well a kid was eating and walked past me in the mall and the food spilt on my hands. Don't worry the clothes are good."

"Oh terrific." She started to walk away, "Are you okay?"

I nodded and smiled as she walked up to our room and beckoned me to come as well.

**-End Flashback-**

"So you didn't get food spilt on you and you didn't get my present shipped from Canada?" Alice asked deep in thought.

"No sorry, honey."

"It's okay you just wanted to explore the world. And get a phone number." She growled.

"I threw it away!"

Alice got up and sat on my lap hugging me, I love her too much to ever hurt her.

"So Jazzy, how did it taste?" Emmett asked innocently.

"IT WAS A BIGMAC HOW DO YOU THINK? Well, the fries weren't that bad." I replied before storming off into my little bat cave and dropped little Alice onto the floor.

I'm not talking about our room I seriously made a bat cave.

"JASPER! YOU DROPPED ME!"

"Oh no, Batman activate"

Yes, now I'm invisible.


End file.
